Posted in Family, fatherhood, Funny, Kids, memories, mommyhood, Parenting, Uncategorized

The Attitude Adjuster? Or the Board of Education?

The Attitude Adjuster or the Board of Education?

When I was just a wee lad, those, ladies and gentlemen, were my two choices.  Well, either pick one of those or wait for dad to get home.  I usually just picked one and let her get on with it already.

It was a wooden paddle.  On one side of the paddle were the words “The Attitude Adjuster,” and on the other side were the words “The Board of Education.”  If my recollections are correct, my mother had used black marker on this paddle of hers and even drew little designs on it (as if the pretty designs were going to lessen the pain any).

I’m not going to pretend that I was the perfect child.  That paddle landed on my behind more times than I care to remember.  I usually chose the paddle instead of my dad because my dad’s hands were actually thicker than the paddle.  Plus, it was just plain embarrassing getting hand-whooped by my dad.

How are we supposed to get through to children these days?  I don’t think we’re allowed to carry around decorated wooden paddles anymore.  Are we? 

I never understood the whole “spanking” thing when I was a kid.  However, I’ve now watched a couple of my sweet, innocent young girls turn into the occasional back-mouthing pre-teen.  I think I’m starting to understand.

*Side note*

I googled paddles to try to find a picture similar to the one my mom used for an example and it came back with the kind for boats.  I then googled spanking paddles.


Wow.   THOSE were not the type of paddle that was used to whip me into shape!  My goodness, there are some very adventurous people out there in the world though.

*Side note over*

Basically, I just want to say to my mom, dad, fellow moms and dads, grandparents, teachers, babysitters that I get it.  Sometimes these little kids could use an attitude adjustment.  Sometimes they could stand to learn a lesson.

Grounding seems to work pretty well some of the time, and the little “time-out” rocking chair for the babies is working great for them.  I think I might find my own paddle though.  I could probably draw some sweet designs on it (like little kids grabbing at their backside while wincing in agony).  Maybe I’ll just hang it up on a hook on the stairs up to their room.  Yeah.  That’ll learn ’em.



Hello. I'm a 38 year-old husband and proud father of five children (all of which are girls). In addition to writing this blog, our family has a YouTube channel, called BaileyLiving.

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